My Fridge

When I tell people what I don't eat, I often get asked, "well, what the heck DO you eat?!" So here is a picture to answer that question.

So what we have here is, hummus and sunbutter (sunbutter is like peanut butter, but it's made from sunflower seeds), almond milk, olives, organic butter, and a bunch of organic fruits and veggies.
In my cupboard there is some quinoa, some rice, a bag of lentils, a bag of black beans, several kinds of nuts, a garlic clove, some ginger root, one bag of popcorn, a small jar of local honey, several jars of spices, and several herbal teas.
And that, my friends, is what I eat, with an occasional rice cake or rice cracker.

I have a problem with using that word sometimes. Especially when there's not a "reason" to back it up. For example:
"Wanna go out for breakfast?"
"No thanks."
That is uncomfortable to me. Whereas
"Wanna go out for breakfast?"
"Aw, I have a doctor's appointment, I can't."
feels ok. There's a reason beyond "eh, just don't want to." I want to get to a place where how I feel is reason enough to do and not do things. Not how I feel like, am I sick. Just, if I'm interested in doing sometime. Maybe I wanna just stay home and read. Or not have to get dressed. Or whatever. While I do say no for this reason sometimes, without an "excuse," I feel uncomfortable when I do. Like I "should" be doing things...
This applies for nearly every kind of activity. Religious gatherings, family gatherings, purely social events... everything. I have this issue in every arena.

Why aren't my wants a good enough reason, in my head, to do or not do things? An issue to re-visit. Right now, I don't feel like looking deeper. 

Sometimes

Sometimes, I get annoyed with being so sensitive to food. Sometimes.
So, here is a list of reasons why I am GLAD to be sensitive to foods!

1. I get to learn a lot about bodies and how they work!

2. I get to learn a lot about foods, and how they work!

3. I have more incentive to eat healthily than most people!

4. I've met a lot of amazing people I probably wouldn't have if I hadn't had food issues!

5. I know a lot about how to keep myself feeling good!

Detox, Done

Yep. I ate a Luna Bar for breakfast. I think that after my holidays, I will plan another detox, hopefully for longer.

I'm a little disappointed... I think I was just getting to some good stuff with this detox. Oh well... early May will be round 2!

Detox, Day 3

2:00pm
I had a really hard time falling asleep last night... really, I didn't get to sleep til about 6am. As a result, I've pretty much just woken up. I don't feel hungry at all. I don't even really want any lemonade, so I'm just having water right now. I imagine that as I wake up I'll get hungry again, or at least want some lemonade. I remain completely undecided as to whether today is my last day or not. I guess I'll see how it goes. I did lose about 4 pounds so far, I discovered. While weight loss isn't my goal, that is kinda exciting.

4:00pm
Meh, still not really hungry. I keep trying to think of something I might want to eat tomorrow, but nothing really sounds good. Maybe I'll just continue the detox, heh. I am kinda... not tired, really, but just blah. No energy for anything, not even thinking, really.

4:30pm
Never mind. I am hungry.

5:00pm
And also, I am starting to doubt my commitment... why am I doing this, again? Mostly I just want to go to Kabob Grill for some of their lovely rice and falafel. I have two vacations coming up where I suspect it will be hard to eat how I should be, anyway. So maybe I should save the detoxing for after that.... Isn't rationalization great...

8:00pm
Didn't give in to temptation. I will see this through for at least the three days. I haven't managed as much lemonade as recommended today, by far (I've only had two servings out of six), but there's still time.

10:10pm
Made it for the three days. I mean, once I go to bed and wake up. Which I'm about to do.

Detox, Day 2

Update: I did wind up gulping down my 6th and final "lemonade" last night.

12:30pm
I'm a bit sluggish today, but not too bad. Still not feeling terribly hungry. Of course, right now that may be because I can feel the salt water rumbling around in my gut.

1:30pm
Interesting new craving: chicken fingers and french fries. Mmmm, processed deep-fried death, with ranch sauce.

2:10pm
Oooo, or fish and chips... with salt and vinegar...

Apparently fried is what I'm craving today. Grease, yum.

Hmm, that picture was supposed to make me realize how gross greasy, deep fried foods are... but its not working all that well.

3:00pm
I went out to buy more lemons, and got more maple syrup while I was at it. Temptations were everywhere. It turns out stores that sell lemons also sell other yummy foods, lol. And also, are located very near fast food places... that sell lovely greasy fries... which I wouldn't even have to get out of my car to buy.  But I resisted!
I did notice though, at the store, that I'm a little bit trembly. Its not even enough that I notice it when I'm just sitting around at home, but my hands shook a bit while I was typing in stuff for my credit card.

3:40pm
Yeah, I thought something was weird. So each serving of lemonade is supposed to be 8 ounces, right? And I have this bottle I've been using to make it, so that I can put the lid on and shake it to mix it. On the bottle's label it says "8 ounces" and I kept thinking "wow, my concept of an ounce is really off." So just now I read under that where it says "servings per bottle: 2.5!" So yesterday I actually had about 12 servings, which is great! You are supposed to try to get 6 to 12.  Oh wait. But that also means I need to be adding more lemon and maple than I have been. I suppose it balances out, since I still had the minimum of the lemon and all. Ah well, life is a learning process.

5:00pm
Encouraging new craving: celery with sunflower seed butter and raisins. At least I'm craving healthy stuff now!

6:00pm
I have a bit of a headache, so I put extra maple in the drink I'm on now. Hopefully that'll knock it out. I'm determined to last at least 3 days!

7:00pm
It is unlikely, but still possible, that I would strangle a kitten for some french fries. It's not so much that I'm hungry... I mean, my belly does feel empty but its not hurting or anything. I just feel like I need to *eat* something. And I'm definitely still craving high-calorie foods. The celery thing was a fluke.
I think I just swallowed a lemon seed.

9:30pm
Being tired helps stop cravings. Good night.

Detox, Day 1

So, I'm doing this thing called the Master Cleanse. It's basically a detox program. I had a reaction to a medication and some of the symptoms are really sticking with me, so (with my doctor being fully aware and supportive) I am trying this.

What it is, is, once a day I drink a litre of salt water. A litre is a LOT when it comes to something gross, lol! The salt water has a ... ahem... a cleansing effect, shall we say. Other than that, all I consume is this interesting "lemonade" stuff. Its 8 ounces water, 2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice, 2 tablespoons pure maple syrup, and a bit of cayenne pepper. I'm supposed to have 6 servings of that a day. And as much plain water as I want. And that's it. For a minimum of 3 days. Note: I have purposely started on a day when I have nothing scheduled for 4 days.
After the initial "lemonade" only part I will do a day or two adding home-made broths and vegetable juices, then purees and smoothies, and then regular foods. except, by "regular" food, I mean no allergens, nothing processed or otherwise un-fooded. Just ... food. Fresh legumes and vegetables and fruits and grains, prepared by actual people... by me, even!

Today is day one.  I'm going to need a lot more lemons! Squeezed by hand, one lemon only yields about 4 tablespoons of juice, it seems. That's one lemon per two servings of drink... 3 lemons a day! I bought 4 or 5, so I'll be heading to store later today, or maybe tomorrow.

3:30pm
So far I'm not all that hungry. The maple syrup is there to keep the blood sugar up (the lemon and cayenne are detoxifiers), and it is doing it's job. I'm not at all shaky or headachey. Of course, it's only 3:30pm... we'll see how I'm feeling later.

5:30pm
I'm having some rpetty impressive cravings, but I don't think I'm actually hungry. Mostly, I want pizza. Like, horrible delivered Domino's pizza. I read online, though, the difference between hunger and a craving: if you imagine yourself sitting down to a large green salad and that sounds good, you are probably hungry. If only the thing you are dreaming about eating (or a similar substitute) sounds good, it's a craving. So yeah... this is a craving. Apparently you crave the things you are detoxing, because your body thinks "ack, I need me some more of this!" So I guess I am currently detoxing salt and fat and gluten and dairy-ness. Be gone, bad stuff! It helps with the craving if I remember that a craving means I am getting rid of stuff that's bad for me.

10:00pm
I've only managed to get down 5 of my 6 servings of the lemonade stuff, but oh well. Still not really hungry, but I did get a bit of a headache a little while ago. I added extra maple syrup to my last drink, though, and that's taken care of the headache. OK, I'm a little hungry.... but not nearly as bad as I thought it would be. One day down!