Thursday, July 22, 2010

Disturbing Nights

I haven't slept very well the past 3 nights.

The first night, I thought it was because of a series of documentaries I had watched. They were pretty graphic, about civil wars and cocaine mafias and all kinds of challenges the world faces. Every time I closed my eyes on that first night, I saw corpses. At first they were ones from the documentaries, but then my brain moved on to corpses I've seen for myself as well. All night I was haunted by bodies. So yeah, I didn't sleep well and when I did doze, it was pretty restless and creepifying.

The second night, I'm not entirely sure what happened... although it probably involved some tea I drank that I thought was caffeine free and wasn't. Oops. I just couldn't settle down til about 4am.

Then last night things seemed to be going well. Got to sleep at a reasonable time, no disturbing images or dreams... and then I woke up suddenly at about 2am. I have no idea why. But when I woke up I was shaky, and little dizzy or disoriented. I became very uncomfortable with the dark, and turned on my bedside lamp. For a while I couldn't even close my eyes again though; I had thoughts direct from some horror movie I've never seen, about ghouls and visceral, vengeful spirits being interested in me. This was really different for me. Usually when I have night time fear, it revolves around aliens. So different that I kind of started to think maybe I was right. So yeah... that took a while to calm down from.

Here's hoping tonight goes better.

No comments: